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    June 26

    It's Been A Long Time............................................Too Long

    WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I DID THIS!!!!!!!!!!! I GUESS I HAVE TOO MUCH ON MY MIND....................... WAY TOO MUCH......AND I JUST DONT KNOW HOW I AM GOING TO COPE WITH ALL OF IT!!!!!! BUT I KNOW ONE THING FOR SURE.......... EVEN IF I SCREWED UP IN A SLIGHT.....WELL, MAYBE BIG TIME, WAY....... THE FACT IS THAT I STILL HAVE INDIVIDUALS WHO LOVES ME FOR ME AND NOT FOR WHAT I DO!!!! THERE ARE THOSE WHO WOULD STILL SUPPORT ME AND HOLD MY HANDS ALL THE WAY............. I HAVE A FAMILY SYSTEM THAT I BELIEVE WOULD HAVE MY ABCK AND THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE WHO WOULD BE THERE FOR ME NO MATTER WHAT....................AND MOST OF ALL I HAVE GOD----------------THE ONE WHO WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME NOR FORSAKE ME---SO I DUN KNOW THAT I CAN MAKE IT:)
    5:58 PM | Add a comment | Permalink | Blog it | Logical/Emotional
    May 05

    The Misconceptions of My Ideology

    Summer Vacations have already started for me and I still dont know what I'm gonna do............... I am in the crossroad of staying where I am and going where i dont want to be..............but I'll have to be there eventually.......................................it's either I do things the way it is expected to be done, and let things flow the way others expect it to...... or I try something new and see if I like it...........after all, isnt life all about experiences???? so what do i do now? hmmmmm- logically, I do what is expected; logically/emotionally, i do what is expected............................. kinda narrows it down-dont you think?!:)
    6:44 PM | Add a comment | Permalink | Blog it | Logical/Emotional
    May 01

    More about this diva

             
     
     
     
               
    3:40 PM | Add a comment | Permalink | Blog it | Logical/Emotional
    April 28

    Hmmm!!!! Damn!!!!

    You know the feeling that you feel when do something you are not supposed to do? hmm!! I have that feeling now............. It's a strange feeling- Cause you know that you are not supposed to do what you did, but you want to do it again cause it felt so.................... So good!! How could something so wrong feel so right and good?? And to complicate things more the circumstances under which they were done.................. I think that the devil himself was shocked................... Yet it felt so................ Good. That's strange huh? And that's what sin does to you................. It makes the wrong feelings feel right; it makes the negatives transform themselves into positives..................; and even though you may feel guilty at times- the guilt goes away when the wrong is thought about all over again!!!!!!!!! IT'S THAT FEELING THAT YOU FEEL WHEN YOU KNOW THAT THE FEELING IS A WRONG FEELING BUT YOU CANT STOP FEELING THAT FEELING THAT YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT FEELLING!!!!!!!!Hmmm!!!! Damn!!!!
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    April 17

    Gratitude

     Well it's the end of the semester and....................... boy oh boy- it's drama inside and out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this semester has been my most hectic, yet; however it has also been my most enjoyable- yet!! and i have a few individuals to thank for it.Open-mouthed

     

     1) God- He is the one who saw me through thick and thin. The one who provided for me and comforted me when the going got though. Without Him I know that i am nothing- that's why i am a proud citizen of  the Gospel!!!Angel

     

     2) THE CREW- that's not our official name- but wait! We dont have an official name....lol!!! We have to come up with one guys...lol!!!!!!!!! but anyways, i wanna say thanks to the "crew" for a wonderful semester. I really had a great time- especially our "surprise treat"..lol. So, to Iyanna, Gvern , Kaylan, Cindy, Akeem, Nigel, and Shaundell- bless up uno self!!! and thanks again guys!!!!!!!!Wink

     

     3) My Counsellor-  I have a counsellor that is as madddd as hell- but then again aren't they all? But he is a special case- and i want to say thank you to him for listening to all of my problems and attempting to cheer me up when i am down. i am also grateful for the mental breakdowns that you had-- the times when i was "priviledged enough to be the shoulder that you chastised................ i learnt a lot from those experiences...:)lol.Tongue out

     

    But there is a particular group of inidviduals that i want to express my sincerest gratitude to............... There's this little word called family that some individuals abuse and then wish they had when it's gone- I dont want to be in that situation. so i am taking the time out to say thank you to my family members for all that they have seen me through.Gift with a bow

     

    My Mom- she may seem harsh at times and unrealistic at other times............ but she's the best mom a daughter could have!!!!!!!!!!!!! I Love You Mom!! You're Number 1!! I wouldn't trade you for anything in the world!!!!!!!Red rose

     

     My Lil Bro- hey.............. what can i say.... he's the cutest and most spoilt in the family...lol and the most loving too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(there, i admitted it.. do you know how much energy it took from me?).Red heart

     

     Step Father- I've spent all my life living with my step father and waiting for the day when he would be the "evil stepdad"!! and i am still waiting!!!!..... the old man is cool (and if he knows i am calling him an old man he would go ballistic..lol) he may not be my real father- in fact i dont want him to be... i love him just for who he is--- my step dad!Smile

     

     My Dad's Family- that was a new addition that i was aquainted with during this semester.......... my dad, my stepmom and my lil bro-CJ. I am still learning about them- but i like what i know so far- and i hope nothing changes!! my dad is cool- i just wish we had a closer father- daughter connection... but things happen for a reason (and in some cases only God knows the ultimate reason). I just met my step mom and CJ- and they're great!!! I love you guys.... Star

     

    That's my semester- in a nut shell................... wait a second.. i forgot someone..lol..and how could i forget that individual?? please forgive me?!Embarrassed

     

    Red hearthe's the most caring, most sensitive, most compassionate individual i have ever met!! A shoulder to lean on... Ears to confide in... Eyes to absorb pain... hands to comfort- he's just perfect! a little too perfect at times, but that's ok. this semester has been a testing time for us both and yet he stayed strong inspite of the fact that i felt like giving up!!! I guess he's strong enough for the both of us!! I love you Malon Danley Peters- and I always will.............Red lips

    12:04 PM | Add a comment | Permalink | Blog it | Logical/Emotional
    March 25

    So What????

     
    so i cant always be there when you need me............does that really make me a bad person? or am i just an indiviudal trying to balance her life..................... so i dont call as often as i used to..................... does it mean that i lost interest? or is it simply because i cant afford to do that........................... so i dont always agree with what you say................. am i not allowed to have opinion? am i retarded? can i not think for myself?? do i have to explain everything to you????.................. so what if i am not disappointed in you............... who says i have to be anyway? isnt life all about new discoveries? do i then have to be disappointed in every new aspect of my life? or should i not learn from them???.................... so what if i am a highly emotional individual who cant always control her feelings and sometimes says things that you think should be kept inside.................... should they really be kept inside? dont others deserve the right to know how i feel??........................... so what if i love those who cant love me and, like eve, i want to eat of the forbidden fruit????................................... whose problem is that anyway................. and even if it's yours............SO WHAT??!!
     
     
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